The Tongue

This year in my 11th grade worldview class I asked a question that became somewhat of a foundation of much of what we considered in class…It was a simple question…

How would you define true freedom?

The most common answer was “True freedom is the ability to do whatever you want”

I believe this is a very important question for all of us to consider, because in many ways the answer will determine how you see a book like James…

This series is called…Wise up…

Wisdom can be defined as the ability to use knowledge, experience, and understanding to make good judgments and decisions, especially in matters of life and conduct

I have always thought simply that wisdom is knowledge put into practice…

And throughout the scriptures writers talk about the value of pursuing it above most everything else…

Proverbs 8:11
…wisdom is more precious than rubies, and nothing you desire can compare with her.

Proverbs 8:35-36
For those who find me (Wisdom) find life and receive favor from the LORD. But those who fail to find me harm themselves; all who hate me love death.”

So to consider our lives, how we take our knowledge and apply it, and to really desire wisdom is such a great thing …

And so looking at James there are a few passages that I believe lay this foundation of wisdom and freedom…and it how James defines the Law…

There had to be a shift in me from seeing the law as restricting me from speeding, steeling, killing, breaking the commandments, sinning, upsetting God, appeasing God, etc to a law that actually teaches me about true freedom…

James 1:25: But whoever looks intently into the perfect law that gives freedom, and continues in it—not forgetting what they have heard, but doing it—they will be blessed in what they do.

Can you see wisdom in there?

Looking intently in the the law, applying that knowledge, finding freedom, and being blessed

This journey for me has transformed my definition of freedom from being able to do whatever I want to being able to have the ability to do what is right, to follow the ways and teachings of Jesus, to see this as an invitation to life of abundance that God intends it to be…

And there is an area I have had to “Wise Up” in, in order to find this freedom, and not just experience the blessing but be more of a blessing…James talks this issue in every chapter of this letter…And Matt even talked about it last week… Let’s see if you can pick it up…

James 1:26
Those who consider themselves religious and yet do not keep a tight rein on their tongues deceive themselves, and their religion is worthless.

James 2:12
Speak and act as those who are going to be judged by the law that gives freedom,

James 3:2
We all stumble in many ways. Anyone who is never at fault in what they say is perfect, able to keep their whole body in check.
James 4:11
Brothers and sisters, do not slander one another.

James 5:9
Don’t grumble against one another

So what do you think? What is the area James is talking about?

We need to Wise Up in how we use our words

Last week Matt talked about being slow to speak, which was such a great message…but when we do speak what do we say?

Because true freedom does not come from being able to say whatever I want whenever I want to…Because the power that comes from these mouths of ours is crazy!!!

Proverbs 18:21
The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit.

How many of you have experienced first hand life or death through words you have spoken or words that have been spoken to you?

“Without knowing the force of words, it is impossible to know more.” -Confucius

Handle them carefully, for words have more power than atom bombs.” -Pearl Hurd (1930’s era politician and poet)

So Wising Up when it comes to how we use our words is something we should seriously consider…

I don’t think that in our day and age I have to really convince you of the power of words…

-just consider our past election (some of the most powerful people in our country using words for the specific purpose of destroying others),

-or social media (so damaging what we can say to each other, especially when not face to face),

-or consider your own homes and relationships (is there anything more power then the words we speak?)

And there is no greater reminder of the power of the tongue then
Then this long description of the tongue by James in chapter 3

James 3:3-10 (doesn’t need to be on the screen)
When we put bits into the mouths of horses to make them obey us, we can turn the whole animal. Or take ships as an example. Although they are so large and are driven by strong winds, they are steered by a very small rudder wherever the pilot wants to go. Likewise, the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark. The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole body, sets the whole course of one’s life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell. All kinds of animals, birds, reptiles and sea creatures are being tamed and have been tamed by mankind, but no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse human beings, who have been made in God’s likeness. Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers and sisters, this should not be.

As James says words are like the bit in a horses mouth or a small rudder on a huge ship…It can move our lives towards death or life so quickly

Or just like a small spark that can burn down all of the palisades…don’t ever underestimate the power of a small word and the damage it can make…When you think of the ripple effect of a word spoken…how it can effect so many…

So this brings up a question for me…why?

Why are words so powerful to bring life and death into our lives?

Luke 6:45
The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For out of the overflow of his heart his mouth speaks.

Let that sink in a bit…What I say is flowing out of my heart, no wonder it can bring life or death…
Our words probably show what really going on inside more then any thing else…

I have come to realize saying things like, I didn’t mean that, or sorry you took that wrong, or I wish I could take that back…Don’t usually seem to work because my heart for the person or situation already got placed on the table through those words and now I am back peddling, but so often the damage has been done…

We need to Wise Up to the fact that the tongue wields so much power because it is revealing the heart of the one using it.

You know Matt asked me to pick something from James to teach on and James 3 was the first verse that came to mind…because this journey with my tongue runs deep…

Back in HS I would say my father and I had a ruff go at it. I felt like for many years I had been pushed, judged, ignored, a little bullied, by my father…wether that is absolutely true or not, it is what I felt…

And I kind of made a decision around 20 to not just take it but start giving it back…and all this was about how we spoke to each other.

I would press my dad huge red button, watch him loose it a bit, and leave kind of laughing that he doesn’t impact me anymore…

And from that things got worse…I had kind of a mentor type person in my life that I could confide in and tell him how much of a pain my dad was and how I decided to take control and use my words to combat his…

He asked me a simple question that has sat with me now for 40 years…

“How is that working out for you?”

This kind of stopped me in my tracks and got me thinking. What was going on in my heart. I had recently become a Christians and for the first time was really thinking about some of this heart issue stuff.

Then one day, I was around 22/23 I was driving to work listen to my pastor giving a message about fathers and sons and he read this song…and I pulled over to the side of the road and broke down…Listen to what he read…

***Cats in the cradle***

I was challenged with the reality that by using my words to focus on myself and to hurt my dad was showing me something about my heart…

We need to Wise Up to what’s going on in our hearts when
we use our words to benefit ourselves and hurt others

On the side of that road I recognized that battle in my heart, turned it over to God, and decided to make a difference….And a key verse for me came from

Ephesians 4:29
Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.

There are 2 basic things I choose to do that didn’t just impact my relationship with my dad but has become a foundation desire for me to live into every day of my life…

Wise UP to humbly stop say things that hurt, humiliate, or divide.

This was the first step for me…to just stop. It wasn’t just being slow to speak but to actually Stop talking the way I was to my dad…

And this has taken deep root in my heart and mind…so deep that I consider how I talk about others in my own head, when Im just with my wife or friends…

Still to this day I try to stop talking about others, politicians, athletes, famous people in a negative way…even just in my own time with myself…

I really work on, as James says, not slandering, not grumbling, not complaining.

And I try to not watch or engage in places that do. Too much news, social media, etc can really have an effect on your heart which will show itself through your words.

But there was something else this verse in Ephesians says that has become a key in the journey for me….

Ephesians 4:29
Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.

I couldn’t just stop saying hurtful things but I had to start saying beneficial things…

2. Wise Up to humbly begin to says things that heal,
encourage, and unify

When it came to my dad to stop using hurtful words was though but starting to use beneficial words was even tougher…

But the change that started happening in me was profound, and ultimately I made a huge impact on my relationship with my dad…

For the next 7 years or so our relationship became one of the most import ones in my life. Around when I was 30 my dad got a brain tumor and died in a month…And I don’t regret the heart journey I went on that transformed by life, my relationship with my dad, and I believe how I am as a husband and dad was so deeply impacted.

True freedom is the ability to use our words to bring life instead of death into a world that so desperately needs it

Don’t ever underestimate the butterfly effect of your words…Its not just about how they effect you, but how they effect others, and how others then effect others….Yours are such a powerful tool to bring life into this world…

James 3:13
Who is wise and understanding among you? Let them show it by their good life, by deeds done in the humility that comes from wisdom.

May you see one of the greatest “deeds” you bring to the world around you is having the wisdom to use your words to bring life

Let’s pray….