Hijacked: Worry

Good morning.

If we haven’t met, I’m Matt VanCleave, one of the pastors here at Blue Oaks.

You know, anytime you walk into a place like this, there’s a little risk involved.

You don’t know what you’ll hear, how people will act, or whether this will feel relevant to you.

So if you took that risk today — whether you believe any of this or not — I just want to say thank you for being here.

We’re in a teaching series called Hijacked.

And over the last few weeks, we’ve been talking about what happens when something inside us takes over — when anger, worry, desire, or pride grabs the wheel and suddenly we’re not responding the way we want to respond.

For the last three weeks, we’ve focused on anger — how it hijacks us, why it feels so powerful, and how to take back the wheel.

Today, we shift to a different hijacker. One that’s quieter, more socially acceptable, and in some ways, more exhausting — Worry.

Anger tends to be loud. Worry tends to be constant.

Anger shows up in bursts. Worry hums in the background of your life.

And here’s the tricky part — worry doesn’t usually feel like losing control.

It feels like being responsible.
It feels like being thoughtful.
It feels like caring.
It feels like staying one step ahead.

But over time, worry does something subtle. It doesn’t just occupy your mind — it takes the wheel.

It decides what you say yes to…

what you say no to…
what risks you take…
what you avoid…
and how tightly you hold onto control.
And for a lot of people, worry has been driving for so long, they don’t even recognize it as a hijacker anymore. It just feels like normal life.

If that’s you, I want to say something right up front.

This is not a sermon about trying harder to stop worrying. It’s not a sermon about pretending everything is fine. And it’s definitely not a sermon meant to shame anxious people.

Some of you are wired toward anxiety.
Some of you grew up in environments where worry was how you survived.
Some of you are carrying real responsibilities, and real pressure, and real uncertainty.

So today is not about trying harder to stop worrying. It’s about learning to recognize when fear is driving — and how to gently and faithfully take back the wheel.

Do you know what the most common command in Scripture is?

Do not be afraid… or anxious… or worried… or fearful.

And the reason is — worry hijacks our ability to trust God — and once fear takes the wheel, it starts deciding our pace… our priorities… and our yeses and nos.

When worry takes the wheel, it doesn’t just steal our peace — it reshapes our whole life.

It narrows our focus… It drains our energy… And it slowly trains us to live as if we’re on our own.

Now, worry is the direct opposite of experiencing the presence and power of God.

So the writers of Scripture have a lot to say about it.

And to start today I want to look together at what the writers of Scripture say we’re to experience instead of worry.

Let’s look at just a few passages from Scripture.

Philippians 4:6-7

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.
And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

In Psalm 4:8 the psalmist says:

In peace I will lie down and sleep, for you alone, Lord, make me dwell in safety.

And then in John 14:27, Jesus says in his final teaching with his disciples:

Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.

The peace that the writers of Scripture talk about is the settled conviction that goes right down to the core of your being — that all things are in God’s hands and, therefore, all things will be well… and, therefore, you can live free of burden, worry and fear.

I want us to take a quick assessment of worry.

So grab something to take notes on if you have it.

I’ll ask you several questions and you can answer on a scale where

0 means rarely or not at all
1 means sometimes
2 means often
3 means almost every day

Alright, question number one:

Do you wish you worried less?

Question number two:

Do worries sometimes pop into your mind and take over your thinking like annoying, little gnats? Does that happen in your mind? 0, 1, 2, or 3

Next question:

Do you find compliments and/or reassurance hard to take?

Next question:

Are you more concerned than you wish you were with what others think of you?

Next question:

How much do you procrastinate? This is often a sign of worry. 0, 1, 2, or 3

Next question:

Do you avoid confrontations?

The next one is a little longer so stay with me. It’s a little more abstract.

Do you ever feel compelled to worry that a certain bad thing might happen, such as a business deal falling through… or your child not getting picked for the team… or your financial situation collapsing?

Some of us almost feel like if we don’t worry, something bad will happen — like worrying itself is protective.

Alright, last question — are you worried about what your score will be on this quiz?

Now you can total it up.

I’m not going to give diagnostic categories based on your scores. You can take a look at it and draw your own conclusions.
I’m not going to divide this into categories… and I’ll tell you why. It’s a real important part of what I want to talk about today.

Many times, people who struggle most with worry hear a message about worry and peace, and all it does is make them worry more about how much they worry, and how much they must not be trusting God.

And they just beat themselves up for it. And they say, I’ve got to try harder not to worry.

One of the things Jesus says in the Sermon on the Mount is: Do not judge.

Don’t pass judgment. Don’t do that on other people. Don’t do that on yourself.

One of the reasons this is so important is we don’t know anyone else’s story completely.

The research is very clear when it comes to worry — a certain percentage of our population is genetically predisposed to be much more anxious.

You could draw a bell-shaped curve and look at worry.

There will be certain people on the far right of the curve who almost never get anxious.
They’re genetically predisposed to be risk-takers.
They’re drawn to things like skydiving… bungee jumping… extreme games… or karaoke bars.

People in the middle of the bell curve are set up for normal experiences of worry.

And then people at the left end of the curve are genetically predisposed to be quite sensitive to worry.

Now… just because you’re on the right side of this bell curve doesn’t mean you’re more spiritually mature or have more faith than someone on the far left.

Just because you’re on the far left doesn’t mean you’re spiritually inferior to someone who is on the thrill-seeking far right.

Jesus said, “Don’t judge…” because only God sees into the brains and the neurons and knows all the raw material that every one of us wrestles with.

That’s part of why it’s so important that we lift each other up… that we challenge each other… that we exhort each other… that we admonish each other — but we don’t judge.

The goal is not that you’ve got to be perfect today or tomorrow.

The goal is just to grow one step at a time, starting with wherever you are.

In a room this size, I’m very aware some of you, right now, are wrestling with crippling levels of worry.

For some, simply coming to a service like this required a level of courage that the rest of us would marvel at.

One more comment on this: If you wrestle with crippling levels of worry… seeing a qualified Christian counselor and maybe even using carefully monitored medication might be a very important part of the healing process.

But Jesus says, “Don’t judge…” because we all start at different places on this one.

We’ll talk more next week about how we open ourselves up to the peace of God… and what things we can do to keep ourselves more in his presence and power.

What I want to do in the moments that remain today is discuss three classic mistakes that people make in dealing with worry that may cause a hijack… and hinder us from living in the presence and power of God.

3 mistakes that may cause a hijack.

The first one is:

I believe I deserve worry-producing thoughts.

I believe it ought to come my way — that experiencing worry-producing thoughts might actually end up being productive in some way.

In Proverbs 12:25, the writer says,

Anxiety weighs down the heart.

Now, I want to make a distinction at this point. This is very important on this subject.

There’s a very important distinction between what might be called “alarm” versus worry or anxiousness.

Alarm is the strong, initial feeling of unpleasantness or concern designed to alert you that something is wrong.

Alarm is designed to prompt you to take action.

I want you to think of an alarm clock.

That’s what we call the kind of clock that’s supposed to wake you up when you’re sleeping.

An alarm goes off. It’s an alarm clock. The day has begun.

It’s not a real optimistic name for something to start the day.

It would be nice if it was called an opportunity clock or something like that, but it’s not. It’s an alarm clock.

But the alarm has a purpose. When it goes off, it’s supposed to wake you up.

And once you’re awake, what’s the first thing you do?

You turn off the alarm… because it served its purpose.

That’s supposed to be the first thing you do.

Now imagine if the alarm went off and you woke up, but you never turned it off… and that sound just kept going on all day long.

You had breakfast, and that sound just kept going.
All day while you were at work, that sound just kept on going.
You went home and you had dinner with your family, and that sound just kept going.
You went to church and listened to a message, and that sound just kept going and going and going… like the energizer bunny.

Wouldn’t that get irritating after awhile?

Now, here’s what’s sad. That’s exactly how people who live with anxiety feel.

In fact, anxiety itself is more painful.

And part of what’s sad is if you let that sound go on long enough, after a while you get used to it… and you start to think it’s normal.

We live in a world where people think worry is normal.

But it’s real important to be able to discern what’s alarm and what’s worry.

Alarm is God-given. Alarm is your body and mind saying, “Pay attention. Something matters here.”

Alarm is designed to move you toward wise action. Alarm says, “Do something.”

But worry is what happens when we leave fear in the driver’s seat long after action was possible.

So when the Apostle Paul says, “Be anxious for nothing,” and when Jesus says in the Sermon on the Mount, “Don’t worry about your life” — What are they talking about? What are we NOT supposed to do?

The hallmark of anxious thoughts or worry that God wants to free us from — is not just that thoughts are unpleasant or alarming or that feelings are difficult…

Because that may be going on to alert you to real danger, to say, “Wake up; take action.”

The kind of worry the writers of Scripture say is negative and is not God’s call — is toxic worry.

The thoughts are negative… and self-defeating… and persistent.

They keep repeating themselves.
They keep recycling, over and over, the same ground.

And instead of prompting you to take action… they just become a spiral that actually paralyzes you… and traps you in inaction.

Now, the technical term for this is rumination.

This is a chain of negative thoughts that just don’t stop.

For instance… if you’re worried about finances, it will sound something like this:

Things are not going well financially.
I won’t have enough for retirement.
I’m not even saving properly right now.
I’ve never been good with money.
I haven’t been giving like I should.
I’ve got to do something to make me feel better.
I guess I’ll go buy something expensive.

You just have these negative thoughts, and they result in escapist or paralyzed reactions.

It’s like an alarm clock going off all day long.

That’s worry. And that’s why worry is such a powerful hijacker.

Because once worry is driving, it keeps replaying the same fear over and over — and calls that ‘being responsible.’

Here’s how worry quietly takes over. Worry shifts your focus from trust to control.

It whispers:

“If you don’t stay on top of this, everything will fall apart.”
“You’re the only one who can handle this.”
“Relaxing would be irresponsible.”

And before long, worry isn’t just a feeling. It’s the driver.

But worry doesn’t actually prepare you for the future. It just drains you in the present.

One of the reasons worry is so hard to deal with is because it rarely shows up looking dangerous.

Worry doesn’t announce itself as fear. It disguises itself as responsibility.

Worry says:

“I’m just being realistic.”
“I’m just planning ahead.”
“I’m just thinking things through.”
“If I don’t worry about this, who will?”
And because responsibility is a good thing, we rarely question worry once it puts on that disguise.

But here’s the key distinction:

Responsible people act.
Worried people ruminate.

Responsibility moves you toward wise, concrete action.
Worry keeps you circling the same thoughts over and over again, long after there’s nothing new to do.

Responsibility asks: “What’s the next faithful step?”
Worry asks: “What if everything goes wrong?”

You see… people who live in peace learn to discern the difference between alarm and worry, and they get ruthless about turning off the alarm.

So that’s the first mistake — a person thinks they deserve living with this prolonged experience of anxious thoughts going on in their mind.

Mistake number two is:

I believe worry will enhance my ability to control the circumstances.

We live under the illusion that worry will enhance our ability to control the world.

Anyone here golf?

The image I want you to consider here is someone driving a golf ball.

Have you ever watched what people do after they hit a golf ball?

It’s a fascinating thing because we all have our own approach to the shot… but as soon as the ball is hit… it’s fun to watch what people do at that point.

Some people will wave at it.
Some people will talk to it.
Some people will threaten it.
Some people will contort their bodies.

Have you ever watched this?

People lean over to one side because it’s going the wrong way.
They start hopping in one direction as if they had some kind of magic control over this object that is no longer in their hands.

Here’s one of the secrets to a fun round of golf —

Let it go! Just let it go.

Because once the ball is in the air, pretending you’re still in control is just worry trying to stay in the driver’s seat.

Do all the things you can before hitting the ball.

Get your grip right.
Get your stance right.
Get your alignment right.
Get your back swing and follow through right.

But when you hit the ball, just let it go — and realize that ball is no longer in your control.

So stop pretending that you’re controlling it. Just wave goodbye to that little ball as it’s headed down the fairway… and say, “Okay God, it’s up to you now.”

When worry surfaces… say, “Alright, God. I’ve done what I think I ought to do about this concern; but it’s on my mind, so I want to give it to you.”

That’s exactly what Peter said to do:

Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.

Peter doesn’t say that when you have anxious thoughts, you ought to beat yourself up for not having enough faith in God. He doesn’t say that.

He doesn’t say that when you have anxious thoughts, you should try harder to have more faith.

He says that when worry comes, you’re the middle man. You can just pass that anxious thought right along to God.

Every time an anxious thought comes up, it’s a cue to give it to God.

Now, here’s what happens.

Normally that concern, at some point or another, will reappear.

People get real goofy on this sometimes and they’ll say, “You know, if you had faith, you let it go one time and it never comes back.”

That’s not my experience. Normally the concern will reappear.

And the deeper the concern, probably the sooner and more frequently it will reappear.

So what I’ll do if I find myself feeling concerned about something, I’ll ask, “God are you sending this concern back my way? Is there some action step that you want me to take? Is this an alarm signal now?”

And if so, then I’ll take that action step as best I can with God’s help.

If not, I’ll give it back to God — “Okay God, this concern is surfacing again… I’m giving it back to you.”

If I find I’ve been worrying about it…

I don’t beat myself up.
I don’t say I must not have enough faith or I’m a bad Christian.
I don’t say I’m going to try harder not to worry.
I just remember that God keeps sending another opportunity to trust him with it.

And I say for just this moment — I’m going to cast my concerns back onto God.

Maybe I forgot to do that all day yesterday… and maybe I’ll forget again tomorrow. But I remember right now, so I’ll just give it back to God.

So mistake number two is this goofy idea that somehow worrying will enhance my control.

Let it go.

Mistake number three is:

I allow worry to keep me from saying yes to God.

I allow worry, anxious thoughts, anxious feelings — which are the experience of everyone to some extent — I allow them the power to keep me from saying yes to God’s callings and challenges on my life.

What I want you to think of here is a high ropes course. I’ll explain it in a moment.

This is very important when it comes to worry — hearing messages about how God will take care of you is not, by itself, sufficient to remove the worry from all of your being.

It’s very important to learn, but hearing messages about how God will take care of you is not by itself sufficient to remove the worry.

In order to open myself up to the presence and power of God and the peace of the Spirit, I do need information.

I need to continually expose my mind to certain thoughts and information about God’s character…

But I also need to engage in certain actions.

When I was a pastor in student ministry, we would take our students to a camp that had a high ropes course.

They’ll take you up into the trees — 30 feet off the ground.

Now, before we went on the high ropes course, we all got a little lecture. There was a teaching component.

The staff told us how strong the harnesses were and how the ropes that we would be attached to could support tons of weight, and how the carabineers were just about indestructible.

They would say all of this by way of saying that up on the ropes is a perfectly safe place for you to be. You have no reason to worry up there.

They would say, “You’re in more danger when you’re in your car driving on the way home than you are up on the ropes. I know it won’t feel like that at first, but that’s the truth.”

Now, everyone hears the same lecture.

Here’s what’s interesting.

No one disputes the facts. We all nod our heads. We all believe what they say about being safe. We all do.

But when people get up on the ropes, their stomachs don’t believe they’re safe.
And their armpits don’t believe they’re safe.
Their sweat glands don’t believe they’re safe.

And their minds are telling them something other than the truth, things like:

“This is too high.”
“This is not safe.”
“I’m going to fall.”
“I might die.”

Now at one level, certainly sitting on the ground, everyone knows they’re safe up there.

But their thoughts are not bringing peace. Peace has not worked its way through the whole person.

Here’s what happens when you go on the ropes course.

You go on it the first time, and you’re afraid.
Go on it the second time, and you’re a little less afraid.
Go on it the third time, and you’re a little less afraid than the second time.

And what’s interesting is to look at the high ropes course staff. They’ve been on the ropes hundreds of times.

And because they’ve put themselves through this experience again and again and again… and have experienced being safe again and again and again…
What happens is, miracle of miracles, their thoughts have changed.

Their stomachs and armpits have become convinced that life on the ropes is a perfectly safe place to be.

And their minds have been renewed.

Now, I want you to look at a passage in Scripture that illustrates this as clearly as I know how to illustrate it.

This is Romans 12:1-2.

This may be the foundational text for spiritual formation in the New Testament.

Paul says:

Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sister, in view of God’s mercy, — in light of the wonderful person that God is, having become thoroughly convinced of his competence and goodness, I urge you — to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God — this is your true and proper worship.

Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed — you don’t do it yourself — by the renewing of your mind.
There’s a role that your body plays.
There’s a renewing of your mind.
There’s a transformation of the whole being.

And it’s done by God; but, of course, you’re part of it.

On the ropes course, the staff offer their bodies as living sacrifices. They put their bodies on the ropes time and time and time again and, ultimately, their minds are renewed. They become transformed.

The key moment on the ropes course comes when you say one thing once you’re strapped in and you’re ready to climb.

You say to your instructor or your climbing partner, “On belay.”

That’s a French phrase which means, “I’ve lost my mind.”

No. Actually, to belay a rope means that you make it absolutely secure. You fasten it to something immovable, and then it’s wrapped around this little carabineer.

And when you say, “on belay,” what that means is I’m now connected to a power that will keep me from falling. I’m moving now from just receiving information to actually taking action.

To offer my body as a living sacrifice, I will now actually entrust my body, my life, to what I say I believe — “On belay.”

And the instructor says, “Belay on.”

And then you say, “Climbing,” and the instructor says, “Climb on.” And you’re on your way.

You don’t move forward because you suddenly feel brave — you move forward because you know someone is holding you.

Every time you say “On belay,” you’re choosing to take the wheel back from worry — not by eliminating fear, but by trusting who’s holding you.

Now, the reality is you can listen to a lecture about the safety of carabineers and ropes a hundred thousand times.

You could repeat the whole thing by memory… but that alone would not remove the fear from your body the first time you’re on the ropes.

It’s very important to have that information. If you don’t have that information, you’ll never go on the ropes… but it isn’t enough.

Once you say, “On belay,” if you say it often enough, if you offer your being, your body — if you take action enough, then it’s just a matter of time.

And you may be really lousy at it, and you may be really scared. It doesn’t matter. It’s just a matter of time.

Information alone will not bring about the transformation of the whole person.

This is true of spiritual formation in general.

In way too many churches people sit week after week and they fill up huge notebooks with pages of notes from sermon after sermon after sermon, but they remain just as anxious and worried and angry and joyless as they ever were before.

We’re not going to do that here.

Life is the ropes course.

And every moment of your life — every moment of it — is a chance to learn from the Holy Spirit of God how to live in the presence and power and peace of God.

You have to have a mind that is saturated with the mercy, the goodness, the competence, and the character of God.

And you’ve got to say, “On belay.”

Jesus put it like this about this ropes course that we call life. He said in Matthew 6:34:

Each day has enough trouble of its own.

We all have things going on in our lives that are hard:

Maybe you lost your job.
Maybe you’re struggling financially.
Maybe a loved one has died and you’re grieving.
Maybe you have health problems.
Maybe you have a child who’s going down a real destructive path.
Maybe you’re going through a divorce.

We all live in that world.

And the Apostle Paul says in Philippians 4:6:

Be anxious for nothing.

What Jesus knows, because he took the ropes course himself, is that nothing —

not sickness
not financial loss
not vocational failure
not hostility from others
not horrible wars
not death itself
nothing can separate you from God’s care. Nothing.
And, of course, Jesus knows that. It’s like the instructor on the ropes course knows.

He watches people who are so anxious and fearful, and he knows if they will just keep on the course long enough to get it, they’ll learn it’s a perfectly safe place for them to be.

None of those things can take them out of the hand of God’s care.

Here’s what I most want you to understand:

You’re only going to go through this life one time.
And some wonderful things are going to happen to you.
Some people are going to love you.
And some dreams are going to come true.

And some terrible things will happen to you.
Some people will not like you.
And some dreams will be dashed.
And sometimes you’ll experience pain and problems and disappointment.

You can go through this one-and-only life worried… or you can go through this one-and-only life at peace.

Life is too short
And joy is too good
And God is too wonderful
And your soul is too valuable
And you matter too much to throw away a single moment of your one-and-only life on anxious striving.

You can choose peace. We all can live in it today.

We can all learn to love it… and cherish it… and ask for it… and live in it.

Alright, come back next week and we’ll talk about how to live in it together.

Let’s pray as the worship team comes to lead us in a closing song.