Hijacked by Pride (Part 2)

Good morning.

Before we get to the message I want to say something about our next series that starts March 22nd.

It will be a 3 week series leading to Easter called “The Week That Changed Everything” looking at the 7 days that redefined power, suffering, hope… and life itself.

Not just Easter morning. Not just the empty tomb. But the whole week.

We’re going to look at:

The moment Jesus entered Jerusalem and the crowds erupted with hope.
The moment everything appeared to collapse at the Cross.
And then the moment that changed the course of human history — the Resurrection.

And here’s why I’m excited about this.

Christianity isn’t built on vague inspiration. It’s built on events. Real moments in time that forced real people to decide what they believed about Jesus.

And those same moments still force that question for us.

Who is He? And what does that mean for my life?

If you’ve been following Jesus for years, I think this series will deepen your faith.

If you’ve been disappointed in God at some point, I think this series will speak to that.

If you’re exploring faith, or you’ve got questions about Christianity, this is a great time to lean in — or even invite someone.

And I especially want to encourage you: don’t come alone.

Easter is coming. People are more open than you think.

So start thinking now about who you could bring with you.

Starting March 22, we’re going to walk through the week that changed everything. And I think it may change some of us, too.

Well today we’re in this series called Hijacked — talking about what happens when something inside us quietly takes the wheel.

And we continue this week talking about this horrible problem of pride, self-righteousness or superiority that chokes people, especially people in churches who are pursuing faith and virtue.

Because pride doesn’t just influence us — it quietly takes the wheel.

We’ve talked about anger, worry, and desire — those are kind of universal. But this one — pride, superiority, self-righteousness — is partly so toxic because it often has the fiercest grip on people in the Church.

The primary idea I want to talk about today is expressed in Romans 12:3.

And it gets at a difficult thing.

If you say you really want to do battle with pride… and you want to pursue humility — how do you do that?

It’s kind of a tricky thing, because there’s this dynamic where once I say I want to try to be more humble, then I see myself doing that… and I think, “Hey, I’m getting more humble.”

And then I start to feel proud about that — it’s a difficult thing.

It’s the hardest thing about the pursuit of virtue — it easily gives rise to pride.

This is what Paul is getting at in Romans 12:

For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you. (Romans 12:3.)

For by the grace given to me — remember our whole life now is about grace.

It’s not just what gets us into heaven.
It’s how we speak.
It’s how we live from one moment to the next.

By the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you.

Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought.

Because the moment I start thinking more highly of myself than I ought, pride has already grabbed the wheel.

Think of yourself with sober judgment — just the truth.

Think about a mirror.

The power of a mirror is it has the ability to tell you the truth about yourself.

every line
every wrinkle
every gray hair
every missing hair
every spot
every blemish

It all shows up in the mirror.

And pride hates mirrors. Pride prefers tinted glass.

Now, when you’re a guy and you wake up and look at yourself in the mirror, it’s kind of a sobering thing. But women have certain options to upgrade their faces.

They can wear products with names like ‘concealer.’ That’s an interesting sounding thing for someone to put on themselves, isn’t it?

But if you’re a guy, it’s a little scary because you know when you wake up and take a look in the mirror, that’s as good as it’s going to get all day long.

And a year from now, it’s going to be worse.

That’s the power of a mirror.

And then, there’s the scale.

The power of a scale is it has the ability to tell you the truth about yourself.

We often try to finesse scales.

We take off our shoes, clothes, jewelry.
We get on the scale first thing in the morning before breakfast, so the Cheerios don’t get weighed.
We think real light thoughts in our minds.

Ken Davis has a hilarious account of the time he was actually held underwater to determine the fat content of his body.

And at the end of it, because it was such a traumatic thing for him, he writes, “If you insist on knowing the fat content of your body, I’ve developed a method that won’t cost you a cent. Next time you get out of the shower, grab a stopwatch. Stand in front of a full-length mirror, totally naked. Start the watch and stamp your foot on the floor as hard as you can. When stuff stops moving, punch the watch and check the time.”

He says, “I’m down to three hours and six minutes.”

This one is a little harder to hide — an x-ray.

The power of an x-ray is it has the ability to tell you the truth about yourself.

If you want to be healthy, you go in for an examination. The x-ray can penetrate beneath the surface and allows you to see the reality underneath so you can treat problems you otherwise might not ever know about.

Here’s what I was thinking about in line with these objects:

What if there was a mirror you could look into that would reveal to you the wrinkles and blemishes of your soul?

Would you look?

What if there was a scale you could step on that would give you a reading of the sin content in your heart?

Would you step on it?

Strange thing about us — we avoid knowing the truth about ourselves. We avoid that. We run from it.

The writer of the Book of James says — sometimes people hear the Word of God, but they don’t apply it. That is, they never look at their own spiritual blemishes and wrinkles.

And this is what he says in James 1:

Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like someone who looks at his face in a mirror and, after looking at himself, goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like. (James 1:23-24)

He doesn’t want to look.

In the Book of Daniel, a prophetic word is given one time to a king who has a high sin content.

The word ‘Tekel’ is written by God on the wall, and Daniel interprets it for the king.

Daniel says this is what that word means:

You have been weighed on the scales and found wanting. (Daniel 5:27)

But the Book of Daniel says that this king never humbled himself before the truth about himself. That scale had been weighing him a long time, and he just ignored it. And he died in an act of judgment.

Hebrews 4 says:

For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart. Nothing in all creation is hidden from God’s sight. Everything is uncovered and laid bare before the eyes of him to whom we must give account. (Hebrews 4:12-13)

For the word of God — God’s thoughts, God’s speech, God’s intentions, God’s guidance —

For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow.

It’s like an x-ray.

It judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.

Nothing in all creation is hidden from God’s sight. Everything is uncovered and laid bare before the eyes of him to whom we must give an account.

Like an X-ray, God is able to probe what is most deeply hidden in our minds and our hearts.

My true motives, my honest desires, my secret thoughts — God can reveal them to me.

We’re talking in this series about how the Spirit of God is available to us every moment.

Well, the Spirit of God has the ability to tell you the truth about yourself if you’re open to it.

When he does that, two things will happen.

One is — it will hurt.

When you look in that mirror, when you step on that scale, it will hurt.

Because when pride has been driving, truth feels like an attack.

The other one is — you will grow. Because truth leads to growth.

And the only question really is — which do you want more. Which do you want more — to avoid hurting or to pursue growing?

Are you willing to look in the mirror, to step on the scale, to submit to the X-ray?

Those of you who have been involved in 12-step programs, you will know about this process because it’s step 4 of the 12-step program: Make a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

But this brings us to a crossroads.

The idea is that I make a searching and fearless moral inventory of myself; but the problem is that it’s tempting to make a searching and fearless moral inventory of the person sitting next to you.

It is much more fun to take someone else’s inventory, isn’t it?

Because when I’m evaluating you, pride is still in control.

Because then I can focus on all the areas where I think someone else is doing worse than me, and it makes me feel better about myself.

And that’s what gives rise to pride — when I take other people’s searching and fearless moral inventories.

Now, turn to Matthew 7 for a moment, because this is the dynamic that is precisely what Jesus is teaching about — the desire to take someone else’s searching and fearless moral inventory… instead of your own.

In Matthew 7 Jesus is getting right at the issue of pride that we’re talking about.

He says:

Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.

Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, “Let me take the speck out of your eye,” when all the time there is a plank in your own eye?

You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye. (Matthew 7:1-5)

When Jesus says we’re not to judge, he’s not saying you can’t use moral discernment.

He’s talking about condemning someone.
He’s talking about assuming a position of superiority.
He’s talking about the desire to pass judgment.

And he uses two images here.

One of them is the image of a plank for the problem that’s in you, in your eye.
And the other one is the image of a speck to stand for a flaw or a failure in someone else.

Everyone see this speck I’m holding?

Well, it’s actually microscopic. I’m holding it by faith right now.

This is the attitude Jesus is going after — the attitude that I’m a professional speck remover.

I look for specks in other people.
I pretend to be distressed by them.

But the truth is I enjoy finding them. I get a little twinge of satisfaction from pointing them out.

Some of us think speck removal is a spiritual gift.

There are churches where speck removal is the primary spiritual gift present in that church.

Now, this is very important.

Jesus’ teaching here is often misunderstood.

Dallas Willard writes about this in his book The Divine Conspiracy.

A lot of times, people think what Jesus is saying is — before I condemn someone else, I had better make sure I clean up any character flaws of my own, or else that would be embarrassing.

That’s not what Jesus is saying.

Jesus is not saying to first correct your own character flaws, and then you’ll be able to condemn other people more effectively.

He’s not teaching on how to condemn other people more effectively.

It’s sobering in a world where so many people use condemnation as a way to control others… or get their own way… or manage their worlds.

What would it be like if you put that tool away?
What would it be like if you just didn’t ever condemn other people or treat them with contempt?

What Jesus is saying here is that the very fact that I want to condemn someone and pass judgment and assume a position of superiority — that’s the plank in my eye.

That’s pride at the wheel.

It’s not some other unrelated character flaw.

The very fact that I want to pass judgment on someone shows that my heart is not in alignment with the Spirit.

It’s filled with resentment
probably fear
certainly a lack of love

And this plank of judgment and superiority always distorts my vision.
It always makes other people look worse to me than they are.
And I get a little charge out of that.

I got an email last week from someone at our church that was loaded.

The person said, among other things:

“You need to talk to the young people in our church because they’re not appropriately dressed for church. They’re way too casual. It makes me sick the way some of them dress. I don’t know what their problem is, but you need to do something about it.”

That person doesn’t know me very well.

I thought about high school students and young adults at our church.

And I was thinking there are two ways to think about this appearance issue… because I grew up in a church where I’ve heard that kind of thing before.

And you can think along these lines: Why don’t people know how to dress appropriately for church? What’s the matter with them?

And those could be logical kinds of thoughts.

The other way you can think is — I’m so grateful to be part of a community where people who don’t know how to dress for church feel like it’s a welcome and safe place to come and learn about God.

I’m so grateful to be part of a community that welcomes broken people and messed up people and people who make mistakes… because I’m one of those people.

One way lets pride steer. The other way lets grace drive.

It seems like such a simple thing Jesus asks us to do.

Why would anyone go around looking for specks in other people when they have this big plank of pride in their own eye?

Well, there actually is a reason for this.

There’s a dynamic in the field of social psychology known as the “self-serving bias.”

This is pretty much universal.

It’s the tendency to take too much credit for my success
too little responsibility for my failures
and to live in a state of self-delusion that serves my own ego and needs — my need to feel good about myself.

So I live in a world of illusion about the reality of my character and competence.

This tendency, which was taught about so clearly by Jesus and other biblical writers, has been the object of an immense amount of research in our day.

For instance, researchers surveyed 829,000 high school students and asked the question: Are you above or below average in your ability to get along with other people?

Now, if you think about it statistically — half and half — what percentage of high school students would be below average in their ability to relate with other people?

50%

But what percentage of high school students do you think rated themselves below average?

The reality is 50 percent of them belong in the below average category… but the percentage of them that actually put themselves there was zero — zero percent. Not a single one of them.

Not just that, but 25 percent of them said they were in the top 1 percent of their ability to get along with other people — 25%.

Most drivers think they’re better than the average driver, including most drivers who have been hospitalized for a crash that they caused.

George Barna does a lot of church research. He found that 90 percent of all pastors rated themselves above average in teaching and preaching.

These are people who have to preach on Romans 12:3 — “Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought.”

90 percent of them say they’re in the top 50 percent.

94 percent of college faculty members believe they’re above average teachers.

You think about what that means.

When raises are given — that means most faculty members who don’t get a raise genuinely believe they’re victims of injustice.

And you can see where resentment and conflict become inevitable.

The same thing is true in marriages — both spouses consistently think they contribute more than 50 percent to the division-of-labor issues.

And one more: Most people — this is just the ultimate irony to me — when the concept of the self-serving bias is explained to them… most people rate themselves as better than average at not falling prey to the self-serving bias —

“Other people fall for that, but I wouldn’t. I’m better than the average person at avoiding the self-serving bias.”

David Meyers writes, “The self-serving bias means — our becoming aware of our own sin is like trying to see our own eyeballs.”

It’s distorted our vision like a beam in our eyes.

When pride is driving, we can’t even see that we can’t see.

No wonder the psalmist said:

But who can discern their own errors? Forgive my hidden faults. (Psalm 19:12)

We deceive ourselves. No one can see his own errors.

This tendency of human beings to avoid the truth about ourselves is taken real seriously by the writers of Scripture.

It’s what enables human beings to be filled with self-centeredness, hostility, corruption, and evil… and not even know it.

It’s what makes it possible for someone to be on the road to hell and not have a clue.

It’s what makes it possible for someone to think they’re being really righteous and deeply spiritual when the reality is their heart is a million miles away from God and God’s kind of love.

This is why, as a follower of Jesus who wants to live in the Spirit, in the Spirit of truth, one of the most important practices is the practice of self-examination — asking God to reveal to me the truth about myself.

The classic expression of this in Scripture is Psalm 139:

Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting. (Psalm 139:23-24)

The psalmist asks God to do the searching and fearless inventory.

Because pride will never volunteer for that on its own.

Because of this self-serving bias, I can’t do it.

Only God can give me the grace and strength and truth enough to overcome my distorted vision.

And the psalmist says the purpose of this examination is never to beat myself up or go on a guilt trip. It’s to lead me in the way everlasting — to put me back in the presence and power of the Spirit of God.

We’re going to spend the last few moments here actually doing Romans 12:3 — practicing self-examination.

This is how we take the wheel back.

And as we get ready to do that, I want you to invite God — because you and I don’t do this on our own — invite God to reveal to you the truth about yourself in a way that would be helpful to the well-being of your soul.

God really will do this. He really will reveal truth about yourself to you.

And then just allow your thoughts and responses to be guided by the Spirit.

I’ll give statements in each of the categories we’ve been talking about — anger, worry, desire and pride.

And as I make the statement, you can respond with an A, B, or C response.

A — means things are going well in this area — I’m in a growth mode.

B — means things are neutral — not much change either way.

C — means this is an area of concern — I might be going backwards here.

Just let the Spirit prompt you as we walk through this.

First of all —

Anger

I’m becoming less irritable these days.

A — is there growth in that area? Are you becoming less and less irritated?

B — are you kind of in neutral?

Or C — do you find irritability an increasing problem? Do you fly off the handle easier?

The second statement to rate yourself on in anger:

I increasingly handle my anger in ways that don’t cut me off from the Spirit.

In other words, I don’t attack people.
I don’t withdraw in coldness.
I don’t avoid out of fear.

Last statement in this anger area:

I’m growing in my ability to authentically forgive people.

Is this something you can tell you’re getting better at? A, B, or C?

I’ll just pause here for a moment.

Does the Spirit bring any face to your mind — anyone who you’ve got issues with that you need to resolve or to reconcile?

Just allow the Spirit to do that.

And if a face comes to mind, maybe you need to make a decision that you’re going to go to that person.

Alright, next area —

Worry

First statement:

I’m becoming less discouraged these days.

How are you doing with discouragement? Are you getting better and better, less and less easily discouraged? That would be an A.

Neutral is a B.

If you find yourself getting more easily discouraged these days, that would be a C. That’s an area of concern.

The second statement:

I’m more frequently allowing concerns to motivate me to prayer.

I’m moving more quickly to prayer these days. A, B, or C?

Remember we talked about Paul’s statement: Don’t be anxious about anything. In everything, with prayer, make your requests known to God (Philippians 4:6-7)?

Third statement on worry:

I’m carrying around fewer fears these days.

I have fewer fears these days about money, my job, or what other people think of me. I’m just more confident in God.

Are you growing in this area? A, B, or C?

Next area —

Desire

Or more specifically, mismanaged desire. Again, just let the Spirit prompt you.

First statement:

I’m less a victim of my appetites now than I used to be.

I have a greater sense of self-control. Old desires don’t have me in the grip like they used to.

A, B, or C?

Number two: I’m thinking of donuts right now.

No, I’ll give you another one instead of that one — although now you are thinking of donuts.

The real number two:

I’m living with more openness and less hidden-ness than I used to.

More openness, more of my life is in the light.

I’m letting other people know where I struggle and wrestle.
I’m getting help.
I’m in community.

Less secrecy.
Less patterns of lying and deceit.

What direction is that going for you — A, B, or C?

Last statement on this one:

What I desire and enjoy is increasingly in line with what God wants for me.

In other words, I find my desires increasingly center around that which honors God:

worship
helping the poor
loving my family
living in a sense of God’s presence

My desires are getting in the right alignment with God.

A, B, or C on this one?

Last area —

Pride

Number one:

I’ve become so humble, I amaze myself.

Just see if the person next to you gave themselves an A on that one.

No… here’s number one:

I think I’m becoming less self-preoccupied these days.

I find myself becoming less self-preoccupied.

I find myself thinking more about other people.
more about God
more about the work God has for me to do
less about my own agenda

A, B, or C on this one?

Next statement:

I spend more time serving others than I used to.

Could be serving around the house
or serving people in your neighborhood or work
or serving people who are under-resourced

The servanthood factor is growing in my life — that would be an A.
If it’s in neutral, that would be a B.
And if it’s slipping, that would be a C. That’s an area of concern the Spirit could prompt you on.

Last one:

I’m less critical of others than I was in the past.

I find that people I used to be judgmental towards, I’m feeling more compassion for.
I make fewer self-serving statements.

How is this one going — A, B, or C?

Now, there’s no particular scoring system or adding stuff up with this. The purpose of these questions is just to allow God to help you see the truth about your soul.

I have two closing comments, and they’re both real important.

Sometimes, as you do this self-examination practice, God will bring to your mind

some step you need to take
a person you need to reconcile with
a lie that you need to go back and clean up
hidden behavior you need to bring into the light with someone

When that happens, you need to be ruthless about saying yes.

When the Spirit prompts you, make an immediate commitment that you will obey… and do it right away.

Another thing that’s very important:

Never, ever, ever just stop the process of self-examination with a list of things you’re doing wrong. Never stop there.

Never walk away from it with a sense of burden and destructive guilt.

That is not God’s plan.

Always end by taking whatever time you need to allow God to remind you that you are forgiven and cleansed.

Never walk away with the burden of your sin in this process.

Always pause to remember the promises of Scripture.

Psalm 103:12

As far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us.

Remember that whatever you think you look like in the mirror, God sees you through the cross of Christ, and he doesn’t need to put any concealer on you.

Ephesians 5:27 — He sees you

without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless.

We believe around here in what’s called the priesthood of all believers.

And one of the primary tasks that priests have is to remind the people of God’s forgiveness of sins.

They pronounce forgiveness.

And again, we don’t believe that there is just one priest. We believe that we’re all priests. So we’re supposed to do that for each other.

We need to hear that promise, that assurance from each other. We need that badly.

A lot of people wrestle with guilt and junk, and they never hear that from someone.

So I want to invite you to do something as we close. You can take a pass on this one if you want to. Feel free to take a pass.

But I’d like to invite you right now, to turn to the person next to you and be a priest to them for a moment.

Say to them: You are completely forgiven, and that’s really good news.

And that’s not just something we say to encourage each other. That’s something Jesus secured for us.

Because pride tells us we’re better than we are. Shame tells us we’re worse than we are. The cross tells us the truth.

It tells us we are more sinful than we want to admit… and more loved than we ever dared to hope.

That’s why we don’t just examine ourselves and walk away with guilt. We come to communion. Because it reminds us that when pride has been driving…

when we’ve judged…
when we’ve compared…
when we’ve assumed superiority…

Jesus didn’t condemn us. He gave himself for us.

So today, we don’t just hear that we’re forgiven. We experience it.

On the night Jesus was betrayed, he took bread. He broke it… and he said, “This is my body, given for you.”

Given for proud people.
Given for judgmental people.
Given for self-righteous people.
Given for people who don’t even realize pride has taken the wheel.

Eat it in remembrance of him.

Then Jesus took the cup. And he said, “This cup is the new covenant in my blood, poured out for the forgiveness of sins.”

Not partial forgiveness.
Not reluctant forgiveness.
Complete forgiveness.
As far as the east is from the west.

When you drink it, remember that grace has the final word.

Drink it in remembrance of Him.